Has it really been one year? I suppose it does seem like forever ago and yet when I think about it I remember every single part of that day, that evening, that night and the following morning when I finally got to see Andrew. It was such an ironically beautiful day only to be followed by what would prove to be one of the scariest nights of my life. Whenever I think back to that night at the hospital I remember, despite being surrounded by a waiting room and even hallways filled with family and friends, I felt so incredibly alone. I remember internalizing secret anger when I would hear people laugh. I remember sitting in the hallway alone at one point because no hug, no distant ‘happy’ memory told, absolutely no one could make these overwhelming feelings of confusion, sadness, anger, and just feeling so lost and lonely go away. You learn a lot about yourself when you are faced with the possibly of losing the most important person in your life.
I don’t have a normal marriage and before that I didn’t have a normal relationship. Of course he is my best friend and soulmate, but beyond that he is apart of me. I STILL cry when I go out of town and have to be away. When you see how quickly you can lose someone, you don’t want to waste any moment. So, when we finally left the hospital after what seemed like eternity, I knew we had a long road ahead of us. Looking back it hasn’t been an easy recovery but I will say this…I enjoyed having him home all of the time. I’m not normal…I don’t need time away from him. I’m that total weirdo that wants to just be near him all of the time. Thank goodness he embraces my love.
The progress he has made has been astounding. His will, strength, and courage contributes to his ability to continue to defy the odds. I’m so proud of how far he has come…moreover, I am so proud to call myself his wife. Recently we travelled to Johns Hopkins for Andrew to undergo two more major surgeries. So far his recovery is going well and he’s ready to get back to work in therapy. We are so lucky to have such an amazing doctor in Baltimore. Not only is this guy absolutely brilliant and one of the best in the world…he’s down to earth. He talks to me like a human and treats Andrew like a person…not just another patient. We look forward to our trips there…minus the drive…if I had won the Powerball I would have bought a helicopter to fly us there and back. 😉
This journey is far from being over with and we still have a long road ahead of us. Today, though, we will celebrate just how far we have come. Today I will celebrate my husband and how he continues to prove that real life super heroes exist. We will celebrate all of the triumphs and thank the tragedies for fueling our strength. I’ll remember just how amazing it felt when I finally entered that room in the ICU at 6am the following day after sitting in that hospital staring hopelessly down those cold hallways. I wasn’t alone anymore. “Hey baby.” He said. “I missed you.”
Have a beautiful week you guys. Xoxoxo (Special thank you to Shannon Moffit for our wonderful photos)